Arby's Jalapeno Bites

I cried over Arby's Jalapeno Bites.

...Lemme start at the beginning.

After work yesterday, I was heading over to Will's place for some "quality time" (aka to watch his house play DnD) and was craving some Arby's, specifically their Jalapeno Bites. If I had known they had stopped carrying them as of July 1st, I would have gone and gotten food at one of the four Burger Kings I passed along the way.

But I was determined. I sat in traffic for 30 minutes, increasing my already long drive to an hour, impatient to see Will, and ravenous to boot. My day had been crappy (everything I do is wrong, of course) and I could not wait to ingest unhealthy but delicious jalapeno bites. And see Will, of course, but I was really, REALLY, fucking hungry.

Anyway. Passed four Burger Kings to get my damn Jalapeno bites and they stopped carrying them. Ended up ordering a salad instead, which was the only thing on the menu I could really eat on my diet. Went over to Will's, sat in my car for 10 minutes, and cried like a baby.

Apparently, Arby's Jalapeno Bites were the only thing keeping me sane and away from becoming a homicidal maniac.

After calming down a bit (I felt slightly better, but still emotionally compromised) I went inside, ate, and watched Will and all his housemates, including a few more people, campaign for a couple hours. Will made me delicious coffee, because I was freezing even under a blanket, and as soon as campaign was over left to go back to his parent's place, where he was staying while they are out of town. I also went home, sad that we didn't get to spend more time together, since I won't see him for almost 2 weeks due to work and Otakon.

Today, I am still depressed over the jalapeno bites (yes, it was a blow to my already horrible mindset, shush) and do not want to eat any of the food in the house. I have had a salad, which I am sick and tired of. I've lost 12 pounds in 3 weeks, however, which is good. But I'm STARVING FOR SOME FUCKING JALAPENO BITES. Why, cravings, whhhhyyyy???

RIP, Arby's Jalapeno Bites. You shall be missed, and hopefully I can find a good recipe for them soon.

I wrote something.

Long time no see, blogosphere.

I've been crazy lately, not at all in the right mindset for anything. I may as well admit it somewhere, if not here. Lots of doctors appointments have been happening, with little results. I'm still as sick as I was, if not worse, so. Oooohh well.

Wedding planning has been...happening? Mostly with/without me, but that doesn't make sense to you, does it? I mean to say that I've been going and doing these things, but have not been happy about them. I haven't been happy about anything.

Anyway. I wrote something tonight- I don't know if it'll evolve into anything more, but I'm tired of hiding all the shit I've written in my computer or whatever, so I'm posting it here. Maybe it'll get my ass into gear.

I am really horrible at posting.

Like the title states, I am HORRIBLE at posting. Hence why my journals rarely last long...anyway, It's been almost 3 weeks since my last post. I was doing so well, too. D:

I kept wanting to do this post called "Crafty Tuesday," where I would post a craft I had done previously on my blog, pictures, descriptions, and all. However, I came up with this idea on Thursday of one week...and promptly forgot about it until -after- Tuesday. Like I said, bad at blogging.

I also have been attempting to catch up on sleep/rest, which of course means my body is up with bells on at 9am. :/

I've been doing some real life things, such as reading, playing video games, coaching softball, attempting to do research (first day did NOT go well, not sure what to do now...), laundry, planting some plants (tomatoes, YUM), and hanging out with Will.

I'll eventually get a crafty post or two up here, with pictures and all, but for now I will continue to try and update regularly. We'll see how this goes. :3

One Word About Graduation Weekend: SUCCESS

This post is long overdue...I started writing it a day or two after graduation, but never got around to finishing/posting it. So, here it is.

I walked on Saturday, May 7th, for graduation, with about a billion of my friends (actually, like 10-15 were at my graduation, and another 5 or so graduated later in the day). We were all in a line, and walked together, sat together, and graduated together. It was pretty awesome :)

The ceremony was long, but well-worth sitting through. My feet still hurt like hell from the giant blisters I got while walking (they took us way out of the way to walk over the seal :/) but it was a good day. A long day, but a good day. Will had to go to work at 11:30, and I was really worried that he wouldn't get to see me walk because of it...I walked across the stage right around 11am, and he left right after, so he got to see me. :D

Later that night, I had my graduation party. I mean, engagement party. I mean...EVERYTHING PARTY. Graduation, engagement, AND my cousin's birthday. We had a TON of food...way too much. DX I wanted people to bring food instead of presents, so my parents wouldn't have to cook as much, but mom and Granny still were crazy and made waaaaaaaaaaay too much food.

I ended up getting money from my family and Will's, and Will gave me The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, a very large book containing all five novels and one short story. I'm currently halfway through the fourth book~

I had an okay time at the party...30 people came, including friends and family. I didn't really get to eat because I was trying to talk to everyone, and I felt that I didn't have enough time to talk to everyone, and that not everyone was having a good time. >____< Mainly, it was just stressful.

Before and after I felt like I shouldn't have had the party, especially after my Grandma decided to tell me how much it cost...she's been suuuper bitchy, due to being tired, I guess. Anyway...I was pretty upset, and still kinda am. I really can't wait to move out- I can have pets, and parties, and friends over to hang out.

I think I'm already planning my housewarming party. XD

Anyway, glad to be graduated. :3 Diploma is on the way~

To Do List Day!

I have a couple posts in the works, but I have to edit and add some things before I feel like I can post them, and I am incapable of doing that at work. So, here's my to do list for today:

1. Work. Read the book Will got me while at work. Eventually go home. (THIRTY MINUTES YAY)
2. Get home. Eat food, because poptarts and water do not count as a balanced breakfast.
3. CLEAN ALL THE THINGS (for reference, check out Hyperbole and a Half )
4. No, seriously, clean my freaking room. This semester was not kind to me. My stairs are an obstacle course.
5. Do laundry. (I am running out of pants.) Hang up laundry and put away when finished.
6. At this point my cleaning spree should be winding down. Take out trash and recyclables from room and put in proper receptacles.
7. Type and print softball schedules because I forgot to do so at work.
8. Read more of the book Will got me. (The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, if you must know)
9. Do some crafty stuff.
10. Eventually eat something else so I don't die of low blood sugar.
11. Clean more things, because I probably messed everything up while being crafty.
12. Go visit with Mom and Granny to let them know I'm not dead.
13. SLEEP.

That seems like a pretty good place to end my list. Now I just have to remember what is on my list when I get home so I can do said listed things.

Thirty minutes left. :3

Edit, 5/10/11: Well, I did everything except cleaning stuff. XD;; We did other stuff when I got home.

715 spam messages.

At least I know that Gmail has an AWESOME spam filter. :3

Didn't blog last night due to studying. And I'm still in a depressive mood, but at least it's getting better. Today was my last exam for the semester~ Grades need to come back faster, I swear. :|

Anyway, graduation is Saturday morning. It will be a very looooong day, because after the actual graduation I have to help prepare everything for the party. :D I'm pretty stoked, even if you can't tell.

I really need to stop eating, though. Period. Everything makes me sick, so what's the point? D: Need to make that doctor appointment...

Anyway, this turned out a lot more random than anything else. I'm bored (and sick) at work, so I found something to pass the time that I think everyone should play: http://www.lumosity.com/brain-games/flexibility-games/word-bubbles

It's a brain workout. <3

The Deep Dark Spiral of Death, Doom, and Despair

Lately, I’ve been having a LOT more bad days than good. It’s like every time something bad happens, I go into a spiral of darkness and despair, where everything I do and say is depressing, nothing makes me happy, and everyone and everything just SUCKS. During these moments, I am prone to violent outbursts, crying fits, intense panic attacks, and have a general “stay the fuck away and leave me alone” attitude.

This semester has been filled with them. I honestly cannot remember a day where I was truly happy- there have been moments where I was having fun, I think, but nothing really memorable. When Will is around, I’m okay, but not even he can reverse the spiral and the way it affects me. He keeps it at bay for a little while, but it always comes back.

Anyway, currently freaking out that I’m not going to graduate this semester…this year, even. Intermediate Biochemistry was my downfall last year, too, and taking it this semester proved to be a horrible, hateful idea. This class, mixed with all the stress of working, running a club, all my other classes, and family shit was the worst idea in the world. I need at least a C to pass and graduate on time.

I have no idea how I did on that final. I guess we’ll see soon enough. I just really wish teachers wouldn’t say one thing and then take it back. :/